Category: Human-Canine Bond

Stress Crisis: Dogs and Humans Under Pressure

 

Michael Baugh CDBC CPDT-KSA

The biggest challenge in dog training these days is us.

We humans are stressed out. Life is coming at us (coming for us) from all directions. Work pressure is endemic. Social media is a constant mirror to our perceived inadequacies. It’s an election year.

This summer the U.S. Surgeon General actually issued a mental health advisory. Let’s not take that lightly. The Surgeon General reserves health advisories for big stuff, like warnings about smoking or AIDS. This advisory sounded the alarm about the mental health of parents. Forty-eight percent of parents say their stress is “completely overwhelming.” They’re worried about money, safety, their children’s future. And they’re worried about time. They’ve maxed out their schedules. They simply don’t have enough time in a day to do everything they need to do.

One of the more popular theories is that our brain’s evolution hasn’t been able to keep up with all of our technological advancements. We’ve made the world too complicated and fast-paced for our own good. That might be true.

We humans crave joy. I think more than that even; we crave peace. We just want some relief from the cacophony of daily life. So, we get a dog to help.

The trouble is (this is my opinion), our dog’s brain evolution hasn’t been able to keep up with all the changes either. Dogs evolved with us. Nature tied their lives inextricably to ours. The joke online these days is “I got a dog for my anxiety and ended up with a dog with anxiety.” It’s not funny, probably because the truth of the matter is so stark. We are under pressure and, inadvertently or otherwise, we put our dogs under a great deal of pressure, too. Dogs who traditionally hunted, guarded, or herded are now our surrogate children (or, worse, our mental health caretakers). Most do well. They walk tethered to us, wait patiently under tables at our favorite ice house, pass the hours with the mob at daycare.

Some, the ones I meet, succumb to the pressure. They growl, snarl, snap, and bite. We balk. Dogs are supposed to be good. We should know better, though. Dogs are doing the best they can, just like we are.

I can’t address the pressure we humans are under. At a minimum, we all need a good friend to talk to. We’d all probably do well with some therapy, or at least a nice group hug. But your dog’s stress, that I can help with.

Here are some ideas you can start today that take very little extra time out of your schedule. I think you’ll enjoy some of them, too.

Notice your dog. Observe. Watch what your dog does when they don’t know you’re looking. It’s fun. I think it’s fascinating and relaxing at the same time. It can also be downright entertaining.

Spend some quiet time with your dog together every day in physical contact, petting, or cuddling. It’s good for you. It’s good for your dog.

Play. This is how social animals bond. It’s how we can bond with our dog. Every human-dog pairing is different. My last dog played fetch. My current dog loves to play tug. Find the interactive game that works best for you and your dog.

Train. Don’t think of dog training as a chore. Think of it as a way of starting a dialogue with your dog. Communication helps us feel less isolated, more connected. I suspect it feels that way to our dogs as well.

There is good news. Again, this is my opinion. It might be true that our legacy brains (and those of our dogs) are struggling to keep up with the world we’ve created. It sure feels like that most days. But here’s what else is true: we humans are amazing learners. We adapt. Humans can tap into ancient wisdom for comfort and insight. We are rich in philosophy and faith. And, there’s more good news. Our dogs are amazing learners alongside us. We’ve co-evolved navigating change and learning together.

There’s hope for us, I think.

If the pressure feels like too much some days (every day?), that’s okay. I feel it. I think we’re normal. Reach out for help. Reach out to a friend, trusted clergy, a therapist. We are social creatures. Human existence was never meant to be a solo endeavor.

If you see your dog is having a hard time, well, that happens too. There’s help for both of y’all. I’m here for you. At the very least, I can connect you to help for your dog.

The romantic in me wants to shout out: “we can get through this together.” The truth is we are already, day by day. Evolution be damned. You, me, our dogs – we’ve got this.

 

Michael Baugh teaches dog training in Houston, TX. He specializes in aggressive dog training.

Dog Behavior – What I Learned from Animals on The Galápagos Islands

Michael Baugh CDBC CPDT-KSA

On about the 5th day of our trip it occurred to me that The Galápagos Islands are one of the few places on earth where everything is still as it should be. There are very few humans. We fish there, but not too much. Birds and large mammals, like the sea lions, are mostly safe from us. We haven’t crowded the animals out or paved everything over. There are a few towns and two small airports. There are small ports and motorized boats. Still, in most ways the animal inhabitants of The Galápagos live as they have for hundreds of years.

What happens when animals live with relatively few pressures from human beings? This is my opinion as a matter of experience. They thrive. This appears in their physical and reproductive health. It also shows in their behavioral health. Because of strict conservation laws, humans are not allowed to hunt or harass animals on the islands. As a result, many are very trusting of us – friendly, in fact. Curious juvenile sea lions routinely approached us on the beach and in the water. Penguins swam up to us and around us, sometimes within inches. Iguanas tolerated our clumsy trodding over them. Birds flew and landed nearby. Giant tortoises plodded along with nary a notice. These are animals under absolutely no pressure from humans. I daresay they are better for it – happier.

It got me thinking about our dogs. The hard truth is we put our dogs under a lot of pressure. Even the Belgian Malinois at The Galápagos airport on Baltra is under pressure. Say on a leash. Stay in a crate. Climb the luggage and sniff for contraband. Meanwhile back in Houston we insist our dogs answer our every command. Stay alone for hours on end. Move at our pace on walks. Meet who we want them to meet when we want it, including other dogs. All the while remain friendly. Never express an emotion unless it’s one of the ones we like. Behave this way in public, in crowds, wearing a harness and a leash and silly clothes.

What if we just let our dogs be dogs? Would that be enough for us? Aren’t they already enough? What if our influence on them was light and kind? What if they got a fraction of the empathy and respect we were required to show the sea lions on the beaches of The Galápagos? Our dogs are noble animals. They are not toys. They are not Disney characters. They’ve evolved with us. They are uniquely suited to live with us. But, our life with them is not all about us. This isn’t all about us.

Human beings, Homo Sapiens, have walked the earth for about 300-thousand years. Only in the past 500 or so years did we really start to spread. Whalers stumbled upon The Galápagos in the early 1500’s. The industrial revolution started just 200 years ago. Two hundred years is very recent compared to 300-thousand. I’ve often said to clients that we humans have already won the evolutionary race. We inhabit every bit of the earth. For better or worse, we’ve won.

I stood on a beach no one had walked on since the last high tide. I could see stingrays and eagle rays in the surf. Bright orange crabs clung to the lava rocks. A green sea turtle crawled out of the water. Giant frigate birds, broad-winged but barely 2-pounds in weight, floated above. This is where everything is still as it should be,  I thought. It wasn’t that long ago that the whole planet was like this, 400 years ago, 500. What happened? When did we decide it was all ours and only ours?

For many of us, our dogs are our only real connection to the natural world. That’s a lot of responsibility for one species. It’s even more responsibility for us. I’m in the business of helping people teach their dogs. But I wonder. What could we learn from our dogs, or from the squirrel, or the cardinal, or the possum, those fragments of the wild that remain? What could they teach us about ourselves?

 

Michael Baugh teaches dog training in Houston, TX. He specializes in behavior related to fear including aggressive behavior.

Can Dogs Feel What We are Feeling?

 

Michael Baugh CDBC CPDT-KSA

It’s called emotional contagion. The idea is that dogs perceive our emotions and then experience an emotional response themselves. Affective empathy takes it a bit further. Dogs can actually feel our emotional experiences. (Karen London PhD, Bark Magazine). It turns out that there’s plenty of evidence to suggest both of these ideas are true. (Google “emotional contagion dogs.” Use google scholar for more in-depth results).

Of course, a lot of us have suspected this for a long time. Many of us routinely experience it. Dogs just get us. They have feelings with us. They are little mirrors into our emotional lives. It’s an amazing thing to witness as a dog behavior consultant. I meet a ton of people and their dogs every year. Sometimes it’s very clear to me that a dog who is suffering emotionally lives with a human who is also suffering. It’s heartbreaking sometimes. It’s also awe inspiring to see such a powerful bond playing out in real time right in front of me.

Folks ask all the time, “is he (the dog) feeding off my anxiety.” Well, maybe. We certainly know our feelings show up in our dogs’ emotional lives. But, the answer, in my opinion, is not to blame ourselves. Too many trainers do that, as if our anxiety is some form of mystical “energy” that we control. Instead, I think we should all make space to compassionately look at the big picture. How is my dog doing? How am I doing? For me this means regular counseling so I can develop and maintain my own emotional and behavioral flexibility. You probably know how passionate I am about our dogs’ behavioral flexibility. The Magazine Psychology Today has a great online resource for finding a therapist that is right for you. Staying emotionally and behaviorally flexible is good for all of us (like yoga for our feelings).

Does this mean we all have to be in therapy? Um, maybe. Does it mean we all have to have our lives in perfect order before we can have a dog or help the dog we already have? No, of course not. In fact, many dogs have emotional and behavioral problems completely separate from our own human issues. The research suggests that our dogs can experience our feeling. It does not say that every dog’s behavior issue (including fear and aggression) is somehow tied to our own disfunction. It’s not. By far most of the clients I meet are joy-filled and highly functioning. And, some of them have grumpy dogs. Remember? No blame.

What does all of this mean for those of us who have dogs with fear, anxiety, or aggressive behavior? We all like some concise tips and I’m happy to add some information to the mix.

Think well of your dog. The things we tell ourselves about our dog are important. Instead of getting stuck in negative thoughts and frustration, let’s remind ourselves of all that is good about our dog. It will help our training. It will also set us up to notice progress as it comes. How we think about our dog is so important. That’s why I list it first.

Choose joy. It’s not always easy but I think it always helps. When we are training let’s make a decision to smile, say kind things to our dogs, and use food. Even though our bigger behavior goals with our dog might be challenging, individual training session can be light and fun.

Take breaks. If you’re feeling tense or angry during a training session, stop. Take a break.  It’s okay. Your dog will definitely sense that tension and anger and it will affect their learning. Take a long break if you need to. We’ve all been there. No blame. Just circle back later.

Let me help. That’s what our journal is for. I’m not qualified to offer human therapy. At the same time I am a fellow human being. I can definitely help us keep things on track with training and offer coaching along the way. Complicated behavior plans related to fear and aggression can sometime feel overwhelming and isolating. Of course, you’re not alone. And, it’s my job to clarify what seems complicated and ease frustration along the way.

One last story. I’ll keep it brief. I learned a long time ago why I gravitated toward helping fearful and sometimes angry dogs. It’s because it helped me. Some of you have heard me joke aloud with your dog, “I get it honey, people scare me too.” Like all jokes there was some truth in that. So, we break things down for our dog; we set them up to succeed; we let them take on new experiences at their own pace; we provide support and feedback to help them. All that feels very familiar to me personally. In time, almost always, feelings start to change little-by-little. In them. In us. What a joy it is to see that happening. What a beautiful lesson it is to experience through our dogs.

Change. It’s the stuff of life. Human emotions reflected in our beloved dogs. The hard work that softens them, that softens us, a team in transition together. It’s amazing how our feelings affect our dogs. But, oh how our dogs affect our feelings. It’s a gift for which I am ever so grateful.

 

Michael Baugh is a behavior consultant and dog trainer in Houston, TX. He works with clients all over North America and specializes in aggressive dog training.